So much beauty out there

October 6, 2006


Filed under: All,Short Fiction — Josh @ 2:35 pm

An imagined conversation. At a party. Utterly devoid of context or meaning.

So, are you OK? You seem a little … I dunno …

Yeah, I’m fine. You know, I don’t get out much, I’m possibly a little overexcited. I’ll be fine once I’ve taken my ritalin.

She laughed. Maybe this encouraged him, maybe he was going to say it whatever. The words were kinda unstoppable.

By the way, have people told you how utterly, ridiculously sensational you look?

Er… well, a few times I guess. But I’ve usually been dating them at the time, rather than saying hello

Heh, yeah I guess it might seem a bit abrupt, but a couple of days ago someone I work with told me I looked ravishingly handsome, and it really brightened my day. So I’m trying to make sure that, y’know, when people deserve to be complimented that I tell them so.

A colleague huh? Something going on there?

Well, I’m sure she was a real looker 30 years ago, but that’s not the point. I’m thinking it doesn’t matter who the person paying the compliments is, what matters is the person who’s getting them. Why should you only get to hear how beautiful you are from your boyfriends and your mother. You don’t need to care a thing about me in order to be congratulated on your looks.

Ok… thanks then, I guess. But what’s to congratulate? Its not like its some great personal achievement to be pretty.

Fine, sure, it’s not like learning the violin or something, but most good things are natural to some extent. Plato was probably born with an aptitude for philosophy, but that doesn’t stop people writing books about how great he was. And here you are, a girl who is as beautiful as Plato was good at philosophising, and it’s considered improper to say so? Tish. Think yourself fortunate I haven’t written a book. Or a sonnet possibly.

So are you saying you want a platonic relationship with me?

Oh, very clever. But I wasn’t finished. I mean, you say its no personal achievement to look pretty, but I’ve shared houses with girls, I’ve seen their bathroom cupboards and their make-up bags. It’s not like men who have a quick shower, spray on some deodorant, have a quick shave and then expect women to fall for their masculine charm. I’m sure you look great without make-up, with your hair mussed-up and so on, but I don’t believe you haven’t put in some effort to look like, I dunno, Aphrodite or someone, if we’re staying on the Greek theme.

You’re kind of obsessed with my looks aren’t you? Pretty shallow don’t you think?

Hey, I laughed at your joke. And if you tell me something about yourself, I’ll look intere…

Oh, you’ll just “look” interested.

Well, I can’t make any promises, probably it’ll be fascinating, but there’s always a chance that you’ll want to talk about shoes or, or reality TV or something. And then I can only fake interest.

Hah, well what I actually want to talk about is you, beca…

Ah, me. Well that is an inherently fascinating topic.

Because that’s just it. When Susie came to visit you, she said you were a bit reserved, a bit tense. And they aren’t the adjectives springing to my mind right now.

Hehe. That was different though, I was the host then, it brings certain obligations, certain responsibilities. Now I’m a guest.

And there are no responsibilities to being a guest?

Hmm, I guess you want to avoid leaving any permanent stains, but that’s pretty much it.



  1. Ho ho, amusing – although I’m having trouble believing in one of the characters. Surely instead of bantering with wit and self-deprecation, the female lead would have replied to the first comment with: “Aw, how lovely! Oh look, there’s !” and dashed off, arms akimbo for a big hug. Which would of course leave the chap regretting not just tapping her on the arse and saying something more caveman-like.

    Comment by Taff — May 15, 2009 @ 2:48 pm | Reply

    • True. Perhaps her friend was trying to get in with the guys’s friend and had asked her to keep him occupied for a bit.

      Comment by Josh — May 15, 2009 @ 3:19 pm | Reply

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